Love Bites
by Science-Fantasy93
Summary: Being a vampire isn't easy for James, but being in love with new vampire slayer Katie isn't easy either. And as if being in love with a slayer isn't hard enough, she seems to think he's an uncaring monster. So, he makes it his mission to prove to her that vampires have feelings too, but proving his point may put more than just his heart on the line... Big Time Halloween AU story.
1. Part I Love Bites

**Disclaimer: I do not, nor have I ever owned Big Time Rush.**

**A/N: Some of you probably know that a lot of my one shots can be a little bit weird, and this story falls into that category. I'd been wanting to write a story set in the Big Time Halloween universe, and I finally got around to writing it. It has a little bit of a twist to it, but I'm hoping the story itself works. I'm planning on it being a three shot, and it's dedicated to my fantastic writing buddy, Jatieluv. Our two year writing buddy anniversary passed exactly a month ago, so this is her belated present.**

**That being said, this thing is...different. For one thing, the writing in it is really unusual for me. It's in third person and present tense, which I almost never do, so if it's a little sloppy in places, hopefully that's why. The characters are also very different than how I usually write them, but I'm hoping it's a good change. The story title comes from the Halestorm song "Love Bites", which is an awesome song with an awesome name. Like I said, this is set in the Big Time Halloween universe, although it's not technically canon. James is 19 and Katie is 17, just because it worked better for the story. Oh, as always I also have to thank Dana2184 for reading the first part and enjoying it. If you get the chance, please check out her story "Cold Dark December".**

**Warnings: Vampires, stakes, mentions of violence, language, bad humor, stupidity, and strong sexual innuendos.**

**Enjoy the first part :)**

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**Part I: Love Bites**

James entirely blames Gustavo for Katie's sudden change in careers. As far as he's concerned, if it wasn't for Gustavo's need to completely dominate and control every single thing in their lives, he wouldn't be in this mess.

It's Gustavo's fault. Entirely his fault.

If he hadn't felt the need to mess around with the hot boy band machine, none of this would currently be happening.

James is totally cool with the whole "science is key" crap that Logan likes to spew, and he supports scientific discoveries because, after all, if it wasn't for science Logan and Carlos might be dead. Granted, if they hadn't volunteered themselves to get changed into monsters in the first place, death wouldn't have been such a legitimate concern for ten, long, heart pounding minutes during which they were hooked up to a bunch of wires and test tubes, their last moments of humanity and normalness and life trickling away like water in a sieve. James can still remember what it was like, standing on the opposite side of the glass wall in Dr. Rocquenstein's underground lair at Rocque Records, shoulder to shoulder with Kendall, 16 years old and his dead heart feeling as if it was clenching in on itself, as if it was curling into the fetal position. Because that was how James felt, how he knew Kendall felt, as they watched their friends writhe in pain, mouths agape in silent screams, the color of their skin, the basic genetic makeup of their bodies, all transforming into something alien and foreign, something unrecognizable. Carlos' clothes were ripped in pieces as his body expanded like the Incredible Hulk's, and Logan's right hand dropped to the floor seconds before it was over, crawling across the floor of its own accord.

James still has nightmares about that day, and what Dr. Rocquenstein has just done is not helping matters in the least. He's pretty sure he's going to be the first vampire to go insane.

Because what Dr. Rocquenstein has just done is seriously fucked up. Like, so fucked up James can't even wrap his head around it. Granted, he can't wrap his head around a lot of stuff, but this is taking it to an entirely new level. And he hates it. He just simply fucking hates it.

Because Dr. Rocquenstein has taken the hot boy band machine one step further in scientific evolution. He has never once used it to do anything besides turn monsters into normals and really, it petered out after one time. But he and Kelly, with Logan's help, managed to fix it, and now...Well. Maybe it was Griffin's idea. In fact, James is pretty sure that Arthur Griffin is at least partly to blame for what has happened. Griffin is just evil and corrupt and insane and psycho enough to think that using the machine on a teenage girl is actually a good idea.

In all honesty, James could understand why they would want to use it on Katie if they were trying to turn her into a normal. As a witch, she had a tendency to blow things up and set toads loose on the apartment. It really would have been better for everyone's sanity if she lost her powers, if only for a few hours.

But that's not what happened. Not even close.

One of those two selfish evil geniuses had the fucking _fantabulous _idea to see if it was possible to turn a "monster" into another form of monster. Because that just makes so much fucking sense.

The hot boy band machine was supposed to be used exclusively for hot boy bands, thus the name. But either Dr. Rocquenstein or Griffin decided that it didn't matter, that it would be totally, perfectly fine to stuff a 17 year old witch into the machine, hit the _go _button, and see what comes back out.

And that is how Katie Knight was turned into a vampire slayer.

As far as James is concerned, one vampire slayer in the world is more than enough. It's like the world needing one more Genghis Khan or Kublai Khan or one of those Khan dudes. Whatever. World history has never been his forte.

The point is, vampire slayers to a vampire is like what frozen yogurt is to ice cream - unnervingly unbeatable while being creamy and delicious all at the same time. You just can't win.

That's not to say that vampires and vampire slayers aren't able to get along. It's a taboo relationship by all accounts, sure, but every vampire slayer ends up hooking up with at least one vampire in her lifetime. After all, vampires like sex, they ooze sex appeal, and vampire slayers have a tendency to end up attracted to the dark, mysterious, bad boy type. James' history is proof of that. He's proud to say that at the ripe old age of 19, he's made out with the natural born vampire slayer, Muffy, a half dozen times. She likes to show up at the Palmwoodsylvania around Halloween and playfully try to kill him while flirting outrageously with him. The only thing that would make this whole relationship a little hotter is if she decided to stop trying to stake him just as he's about to get to second base.

A stake in the heart is a total mood killer.

The thing about having the whole love/hate/flirting/making-out relationship with Muffy is that she lives about a hundred miles away and only shows up about once a year. It's not like he, you know, actually lives with her.

He does, however, live with Katie. And waking up to her straddling his waist, her sleek and shiny wooden stake poised over his heart, is not his favorite way to start off his morning.

And that is exactly how his Halloween morning starts off. As a vampire, he might not need as much sleep as the living human does, but he does require it to function properly. If he doesn't get his full consecutive four hours, he winds up cranky with pain shooting through his fangs and his glittering skin looking dull and lifeless. Kind of like Logan, who ever since the transformation has had a not-so-subtle greenish tinge to his flesh.

James groans. Normally he has no problem with waking up to a girl straddling him, and he would mind even less because it's Katie and he may or may not sort of be into her, but the stake pointed at his heart is a bit of a turn off and he's just not kinky enough to turn the whole thing into a sex game. Plus, as Logan likes to remind him whenever he's been staring at her legs or chest for too long, she's still only 17 and is therefore off limits.

Of course, James never really pays attention to what he is and is not allowed to do, but he doesn't actually want to make Kendall go all psycho-werewolf on him, so he keeps his thoughts to himself.

And once again, there's the whole mortal enemies theme going on, which makes it a little hard to really imagine a relationship between them. Hot sex? Fuck yeah. A beautiful, wonderful relationship? Not in this eternity.

"Katie, we've been over this," he begins, voice hoarse and groggy from sleep. "You're not allowed to kill me when I'm sleeping. Your mom even said so."

She flashes him a bright smile, which is a little off-putting as she hasn't exactly turned her stake away yet. "I know. I wasn't trying to kill you. I just wanted to say Happy Halloween."

"You couldn't do that without a stake in your hand?"

Katie shrugs. "It's always nice to have protection."

"Yeah, it is, but you don't see me walking around with condoms in my back pocket." He attempts to roll over but she's unmoving. "Katie, _please _get off."

She smirks. "You'd like that, wouldn't you?" She moves the stake a fraction of a centimeter over, and then slides it down his sternum, being careful to press the side against his bare skin so that she doesn't scratch him. It's times like these when he feels like she really cares.

He could still do without the stake-play, though. It's a little weird.

But Katie continues on, twirling the stake between her fingers before lightly using it to trace his abs, and his breath catches as he sees the look of concentration on her face, the way her brow furrows as she moves the stake just above his stomach, eyes sliding down to the light dusting of hair that's trailing into his boxers.

Speaking of which – his boxers. They are doing very little to hide the fact that he may or may not be just the teeniest tiniest bit aroused. Which, he would like to point out, makes absolutely no sense because seriously, this is just a weird and awkward situation.

But if she feels like tossing in a hand job he won't mind in the least.

Katie lets her fingers follow his happy trail down to the waistband of his boxers, but she stops before he can really understand what's happening. His mind is already blown from having her hands – and precious stake, which, okay, really is very terrifying – all over his body and he's not actually able to form any coherent thoughts right now.

She crawls off of him and he takes the opportunity to roll over onto his stomach, folding his arms and resting his head atop his hands.

The next thing he knows, there's a creak of bed springs and then she's on his back, knees locked around his hips, hands warm and smooth against his back muscles, a welcome change to his naturally cold temperature.

Sometimes being a vampire sucks.

"I think you've passed the point of saying Happy Halloween," James manages to point out, and he can almost see the way Katie's lips curve up into a smirk. "And you can't actually stab me in the heart when I'm on my stomach."

"I'm aware."

"So why are you on top of me?" He figures it's a pretty logical question. It's not like she's actually ever used him as a jungle gym before, and he'd kind of like to know why she's suddenly exploring his body like it's El Dorado. He has a very impressive body, everyone in the world knows that, but she doesn't exactly make it a point of telling him on a regular basis. In fact, up until two minutes ago, he had no idea she appreciates his body so much.

Still not something he's going to complain about.

And he's still wondering if a hand job is in his near future.

Abruptly, Katie gets off his back, clearly done with her exploring. He turns his head, cutting his eyes to her.

"What was that about?"

She shrugged. "A good slayer knows her target inside and out."

The words make his stomach twist and turn and curdle and churn in a way that reminds him of that one time he got really horrendous food poisoning off of a fish sandwich. But what really hits him is the realization that her hands weren't all over him because she likes him and would like to be with him in any particular way. She was only memorizing his body because that's what she thinks she should do as a slayer. It's a cold, clammy reminder that everything between them is different now, a growing distance, the canyon gaping between them, a deep reminder that they are mortal enemies and that no matter what history they have together, no matter how many times he reminds her that he helped teach her how to ride a bike or helped her with her seventh grade math homework, she will always choose her newfound duty over him and that's just the way the world works.

Life is a bitch and he can't even die. He's already freaking _dead_! This is so unfair.

He finds himself moping around the rest of the day, avoiding Katie at all costs in case she has a stake with his name on it at the ready.

Sheesh. Every other vampire gets to hook up with vampire slayers. It's an unspoken tradition. Look at Buffy and Angel. Look at Buffy and Spike. Look at James and Muffy. It's natural for vampires and slayers to want each other, even if it's just for a simple fuck. But Katie doesn't seem to realize that or comprehend it.

But maybe...huh. He bites down on his bottom lip as an idea flashes bright in his head like a light bulb switching on. He's sitting down in the crowded lobby of the Palmwoodsylvania, ignoring Bitters floating around all creepily behind his desk, and even the noise and ruckus from excited monsters and normals can't get in the way of his big plan – the plan that begins with them having it out, and ends with them going at it in a supply closet.

It's a foolproof plan.

And so it's with excitement that he spots Katie getting out of the elevator, just as dark is beginning to fall and the moon is starting to rise high in the sky. It's not something James particularly needs to worry about, because he's a vampire and full moons don't affect him in any way. And ever since Kendall told Jo about his monthly hairy situation, she's been taking him out to the graveyard during full moons and throwing a Frisbee around for him to chase. Sometimes she even gets a hold of an errant mailman just for him.

It's true love.

Katie is in green camouflage hip hugging cargo pants, black boots, and a pink cropped tank top that shows off way too much cleavage for James' comfort. Nevertheless, he rises to his feet to meet her, thinking that someone should have stopped her from going through puberty and turning into a super hot girl because he is so not okay with how much she is affecting him right now.

His nostrils flare slightly as he catches a whiff of something warm and spicy, perhaps cinnamon, and a sniff tells him that Katie is oozing it. She smells like gingerbread, all fresh and warm from the oven just like his mom used to make it on cold December days. He can still recall sitting in front of the living room fire with his gingerbread cookies and sipping hot chocolate, staring into the flames and feeling safe and complete. Perhaps it was the only time during his childhood that he ever really, truly felt like a kid, but at least he has those memories to follow him into his life of eternity.

Immortality is beginning to look less and less appealing. He's getting a little tempted to grab Katie's stake from her and shove it into his chest, although with his luck he'll be the one vampire who can't die from a stake to the heart and all that'll end up happening is him experiencing a lot of fucking pain for a dead thing.

However, it's times like these when he knows he's not really actually dead. If he was, he wouldn't feel that familiar stir in his pants or a sudden heat racing through his veins. He wouldn't be wondering if Katie's wearing that purple lace push-up bra he knows Camille got her for her birthday because "every girl should have at least one nice set of lingerie", nor would he be contemplating if he'll ever get to be the lucky guy who takes her virginity, assuming she didn't already get it on with one of her professors at that damn slayer training camp she went to last summer.

The thought makes his blood boil and he can literally feel it gushing through his body like liquid flames, burning and wet and oh fuck. He needs to stop thinking about the idea of Katie sleeping with another guy because he was possessive when he was alive and he's even more now as a vampire. And it's expected, vampires are known for their possessiveness and jealousy, it comes in with the fangs and the urge for Type O blood, but really, he's about ready to go twist off every guy's head who has ever had an inappropriate thought about Katie.

And with the way she's dressed right now, there wouldn't be any guy left in the lobby besides, well, him. And that's just because he can't twist off his own head. He's talented in many ways, but even he has his limits.

Katie blinks up at him as he approaches, twirling the stake around and he gives it a wary glance before turning back to her. "I think we should have this out once and for all."

She stares at him in utter confusion. "Have what out?"

"_This_. You secretly wanting to kill me."

"James, I don't want to kill you."

Hah. Yeah. Like he really believes that. He woke up that morning to a fucking stake pressed into his chest. He's not that gullible.

"Bullshit," he spats out, sounding a little more angry than he intends to, and she takes a step back as if he slapped her. "You do want to kill me. You're a slayer and I'm a vampire."

"Don't vampires usually want to kill slayers?" she counters, propping her hands on her hips.

"Normally, yes. But I'm a nice vampire." He flashes her his charming smile before it occurs to him that his incisors are a lot more sharp and pointed than they were when he was alive. That might not help his case.

Katie quirks an eyebrow, showing her skepticism.

"I am!" he insists, frowning at her apparent disbelief. "I haven't tried to kill you, whereas you use me for target practice on a daily basis."

It's true too. At least once a day, he has to duck and dodge out of the way to avoid the sharp little piece of wood flying his way. Twice it's landed in his hand. Three times it's caught him in the stomach. And four times it's come dangerously close to his heart. And yeah, it hurts like hell, knowing that this girl, this girl who he's been in love with for the past year, who he would do anything for, who he just wants to be with, would like nothing more than to have him dead, that what remains of his life, no matter how fragile it may be, means so little to her that she's completely casual in the way she goes about trying to take it. That it's nothing more than a game to her.

And it's that thought that sends his entire world crashing down. It's that thought that causes him to gasp for breath and almost choke, almost cry, when his lungs don't expand. It's that thought that makes him suddenly long and crave and itch and just _die _to be human, to be normal, to be _alive_.

But he's not. He'll never be alive again. He'll never be anything more than a parasite feeding off of other people's weakness. His fangs are there for a reason, a reminder of how another person's pain can help to quell his own.

He fights back a wail, trying to breathe but there's nothing there, no expansion or contraction, no nothing. And he can no longer feel the blood rushing through his veins. The fire is gone and the only sensation he's aware of is cold, icy numbness. It is not a good feeling and all he wants to do is go curl up in a ball somewhere and never come out.

James is on the verge of tears now, a huge lump rising in his throat and his eyes are stinging and fuck it! He doesn't cry. He didn't cry when he was bitten that cold winter night on a back street in his hometown, and he sure as hell isn't going to cry over a vampire slayer. After all, if she can't love him, fangs, blood obsession, and all, then she isn't worth his time.

And it's with that final realization that he mutters a "Never mind" to Katie and strides across the lobby, slipping through the door and out into the dark netherworld, the unknown just inches away from his fingertips.

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**Yeah...so...that was Part One. I'm just going to go ahead and say thank you for reading, I hope you enjoyed it, and please review :)**


	2. Part II Suffer in the Darkness

**Disclaimer: I do not own Big Time Rush.**

**A/N: So, here's part II! As always, thank you so much for the reviews, favorites, and follows, they mean so much to me! Part II's title is taken from the lyrics of Halestorm's song "Love Bites", which like I said before, is the song that this story is named after.**

**Warnings: Vampires, slayers, mentions of violence, language, and bad humor.**

**Enjoy Part II :)**

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**Part II: Suffer in the Darkness**

James has the idea to just drive, drive as far away from Palmwoodsylvania as he possibly can. He has no idea where he's going to go but as he climbs into his black Dodge Charger, all smooth lines and sharp angles, sleek and shiny, possible destinations run through his mind. Arizona. New Mexico. South America. Oregon. Washington. New York City. He can go anywhere in the world that he wants and there's nothing stopping him, nothing holding him back. He has the money, he can afford plane tickets. And he really doesn't have much reason to stay, at least not until it's time to begin working on the new album. Katie doesn't want him. Kendall is probably too busy trying to chew the mailman's leg off while Jo cheers. Logan and Righty are doubtlessly getting up close and personal with Camille. And chances are Franken-Carlos is lumbering around, chowing down on a corndog as he tries to ask out any girl who even dares look at him.

He slips the key into the ignition and turns, lips turning up in grim satisfaction as the engine roars to life, breaking the dark silence of the night. He jams the gear selector into reverse, releases the parking brake, and steps down on the accelerator, feeling the pedal give way under the sole of his boot. The car smoothly curves out of the parking space and he shifts it into drive before pulling out onto the street.

He drives.

That's all he does. He just drives.

His Halloween has been ruined by his own mind and his own fears, but also maybe by Katie. No matter what she says, her actions are proof enough that she would prefer him to be dead. At the very least, her slayer instincts want that and James knows that your monster – or un-monster, in her case – instincts always outweigh the leftover conscience and sense that you possessed as a living, breathing human. Granted, Katie has never been a Normal, never been completely human. She was born a witch just like her mother with the power of magic. It was a beautiful thing, to watch her zap up a cake just like that. But when she was turned into a slayer, she lost those powers. She gained other ones – speed, strength, flexibility, a natural ability with weapons – but it's not the same. She will never be able to whip up a cake with a wave of her wand ever again, and James' gut clenches regretfully and sadly at the thought.

It's really quite stupid that he's so regretful over something that isn't even his and he knows this. But he can't help it, can't help but think of what Katie has lost thanks to Dr. Rocquenstein and Griffin. Maybe she doesn't care about magic. Maybe her newfound abilities are enough. But when she was turned into a slayer, some of her humanity fluttered away. And James knows this. He has seen it in her eyes when she looks at him, a darkness behind her pupils that wasn't there before. And it makes him grip the wheel all the more tightly and roll down the window to distract himself.

He still has no idea where he's going.

But damn it, he just doesn't give a shit.

Around midnight he pulls into the parking lot for some 24 hour diner in a small town in southern California. As a vampire, he doesn't need human food to survive, but it is a nice treat once in awhile and he hasn't had a cheeseburger or a shake in quite some time.

He heads on in, hands in his jeans pockets, fangs carefully hidden behind his upper lip. He knows once he speaks his incisors will be painfully obvious, but hopefully this is one of those places that let monsters in as long as they don't destroy the place. LA is crawling with monster-friendly restaurants and stores, but he's not sure about other towns and cities. Back in Minnesota, monsters were frowned upon, looked down on as if they were lesser beings. Perhaps that's changed, but perhaps not. James really doesn't want to know.

He sits down on a stool at the counter, head bent low. He feels like a male lead in one of those film noir movies, with their bowler hats slung low over their foreheads to hood their eyes, backs hunched up with cigars dangling filthy and thick from their mouths.

As he waits for the waitress's attention, he can almost smell the phantom stench of tobacco, can almost feel the presence of a femme fetale approaching him to ask for his help.

It's nights like these that he can't help but flash back to that dark street, the cold clammy hands wrapping around his throat, pushing him into a wall and holding him in place. He can't shake the sensation of sharp incisors piercing the skin of his neck, or the way the mouth moves against his flesh, rougher than a kiss, cold and unyielding, how those lips suck him dry, killing him. How he awakes hours later, lying cold and damp on the sidewalk, snow falling around him, a soft, creamy glow in the early morning sunrise. He can still taste the stranger's blood on his lips and on his tongue, the way his teeth are all too sharp, sinking into his bottom lip as he tries to fight through his confusion and panic, how his body is cold but he isn't even shivering, and then there's the burning pain that begins in the tips of his toes and moves upwards, how _everything _feels as if it is on fire, how there is nothing separating him from the fire, how he and the flames are one and the same, one entity, with no way to tell where he ends and the red hotness begins. It's supposed to be nothing more than a memory, but there are late nights and early mornings when he awakes suddenly with the phantom taste of a stranger's blood on his lips and the sharp, stinging pain of fangs penetrating his skin. It always takes him ages to truly calm back down but the feeling of being invaded, of being used, of being dirty and nasty and ugly has never really gone away.

He sighs, finally catching the waitress's eye, and he orders a triple chocolate shake and a double bacon cheeseburger with a side order of fries. He wishes that his stomach would and could growl and rumble for food, that it would ache, that it would feel hollow until he eats, but he knows it'll never happen, never again. The next best thing he can get is the burning sensation in his throat when he hasn't drank enough blood lately, but it's not enough. It's never enough.

Perhaps that's why he's so sensitive about the whole Katie situation, because he's touchy about being a vampire. He hates what he lost. He didn't even have a choice in the matter like Logan and Carlos, nor was he born with it, like Kendall. And Kendall is still alive. He still gets hungry. He can still feel his heart pounding against his rib cage when he's nervous or anxious or scared. His body temperature can change. And he isn't a blood sucking leech.

James bows his head sadly, gripping the edge of the counter. He fucking hates this. He hates what that vampire did to him. He hates how he had no control over his own fate. Sometimes he thinks he should have just grabbed the nearest piece of wood and stabbed himself in the heart. It would be preferable to this constant agony.

It was bad enough before Gustavo and Griffin decided to experiment on Katie, but it's a million times worse now. The girl who he's been in love with for the past year is his mortal enemy. But while he has no wish or desire to kill her, she doesn't seem to harbor the same affection for him.

It's enough to make him want to drown himself in his milkshake once it arrives, but he settles for sipping on it slowly through the straw, eyes closing as the taste of three different flavors of chocolate explodes on his tongue. At least he didn't lose some things when he was turned.

It's not much, but the thought comforts him in a way.

His cheeseburger and fries are placed in front of him and he tears into them, relishing the taste of something other than refrigerated blood because really, that stuff's nasty.

He's licking the mustard from his lips when the diner door swings open. He tenses at once, sensing that it's a slayer. Not _his _slayer, but _a _slayer. Muffy. Okay, maybe she is his slayer since they always seem to make out whenever they run into each other, but he can't really think about how much he wants his tongue down her throat right now. He's too busy wallowing in self misery. Or, as Logan would say, he's totally throwing a pity party for himself.

Muffy stalks over to him, sliding onto the stool beside him. "Give me one reason why I shouldn't kill you," she challenges, but her voice is flirty.

He can't bring himself to care.

"Because," he mumbles as he continues to chomp on his burger, "I'm eating processed cow meat, not humans."

Muffy gags slightly and her face turns a little green. For someone who kills things on an hourly basis, she sure doesn't have a very strong stomach. "Okay," she croaks out, eyeing what's left of his cheeseburger with a sick expression, "I've just gone vegetarian."

"Whoo fucking hoo." He takes another huge bite of his burger before shoveling a few fries into his mouth. He grabs a nearby salt shaker and dumps it over the fries until they're glistening and sparkling with salt. He sighs as he bites into one. He always liked his fries super salty when he was a normal. That's something that hasn't changed either.

Muffy stares at him. "Okay, what the hell is your problem?"

"What the hell is yours?" he shoots back.

"Usually by now you're trying to get in my pants."

"I haven't been able to get in your pants," he grumbles, turning back to his milkshake.

"That could possibly change if you were a little nicer to me and just let me stake you once."

"If I let you stake me once, I'd die. You'd be having sex with dust."

"You're already dead!" she cries, completely missing the point.

James shrugs and finishes off his burger before stuffing a handful of fries in his mouth. "That doesn't mean I don't have feelings."

Muffy's expression softens slightly as she surveys him, finally noting his hunched shoulders and the down tilt of his head. Behind the blood-sucking expression is a look of sadness. Something actually is wrong.

"What's going on?" she asks, voice as gentle as it can be when talking to her immortal enemy.

He shrugs again.

"Want to kiss?" she tries.

"Not really. I'm not in the mood."

Muffy is beyond taken aback at that one because vampires are notoriously horny bastards who could probably live off of sex if they tried. She kind of gets him not wanting to let her stake him, but he's never had a problem with kissing her. And seriously, he's messing with her mojo here. She's a hot vampire slayer, damn it! And no vampire is going to treat her otherwise.

So she grabs his face and hauls him to her, kissing him forcefully.

He barely responds.

This is just getting insulting.

She lets him go, frowning at him. "Okay, I know I'm hot and I don't need guys acting like I am, but it'd be nice if you actually seemed a little bit interested in me."

"Yeah, yeah, yeah," is his response, eating a few more fries. "I can't be interested in anything right now, not when the love of my life wants to kill me."

Muffy melts slightly, because _awww_! He really does care after all. "Oh, James," she preens slightly, resting her hand on his arm and - oooh, biceps. "You know we can't be together."

He stares at her. "I wasn't talking about you."

The love struck look drops from her face and she reaches into her belt, gripping her wooden stake tightly. "Then who were you talking about?" she demands, dark eyes flinty.

"Katie, Kendall's little sister."

"Isn't she a witch?"

"She was. And then Dr. Rocquenstein and Griffin got a hold of her and tried a new development with the hot boy band machine out on her. She's a slayer now."

Muffy's eyes widen. "Like a vampire slayer?"

"No, a dragon slayer. Yes, a vampire slayer!"

"Well, you don't have to get snarky about it," she pouts.

"This coming from the girl who tried to kill me on our first date."

"You tried to bite me!"

"It was a love bite, a little nibble. I wasn't going to kill you. I'm not a murderer."

"I never said you were. But, I mean, it is in your nature," she points out. "You drink blood. It's how you stay alive, apart from sex."

James' cheeks flame a bright red and he fiddles with his fries, breaking them in half.

Muffy stares at him, before realization hits her like a freight train going two hundred miles an hour. "James? Are you a – a – a virgin?" She can hardly believe that she's asking him that because, hellooo, he's a hot vampire with a killer body – from what she's seen of it – and girls seem to flock to him like pigeons to bread crumbs. Surely he would have gotten laid at least a couple of times in his non-life so far.

"I don't like to talk about it," he mutters, stuffing the rest of his fries in his mouth.

"Awww, you are!" she coos, reaching over and pinching his cheek. "That's so cute!"

He gives her a look. "It's not like I haven't had opportunities, because I have. It's just...well..." Shit, this is embarrassing. He never actually thought he would have to admit his virginal status to anyone, least of all the hot slayer who tries to kill him every time they cross paths.

"It's just what?" she prods him, looking absolutely titillated.

"It's just..." His cheeks burn even hotter and he knows there's no way he's going to be able to get through this confession with any trace of his dignity left. "I'm kind of...waiting. For the right person," he clarifies quickly.

"And who is the right person?" Muffy asks him curiously, even though she kind of already knows.

"Katie. But she clearly doesn't feel the same way about me," he adds, ducking his head sadly. "She uses me as target practice and I woke up this morning with her straddling me and her stake pressed against my chest."

"But she didn't kill you," Muffy points out. "And she hasn't killed you. Did she go to slayer training camp?"

"She did."

"Then she would actually be able to throw a stake at you and sink it right into your heart. Maybe she's just using you as target practice to make it look good, to hide that she actually has feelings for you."

"I don't know..." He sighs, looking completely miserable, and Muffy feels a hot flash of rage course through her body. She wants to go and slap this Katie bitch around because no one messes with James' head. No one. Well, except her, but she's allowed.

"Well, uh, if you ever decide you want to take care of the whole virginity thing without Katie's help, just hit me up," Muffy says to him. "And don't worry, I won't try to kill you until you've had sex a few times. I just can't kill a virgin as good looking as you." She presses her lips to his to emphasize her point, and then pulls back. "Well, I gotta run. I'm hunting a hoard of chimaeras demons. I really only stopped in here for a quick bite."

"You haven't even eaten though," James reminds her.

"True." She places an order of fries and a milkshake to go, grabs her food, kisses James one last time because, fuck, he is an amazing kisser and it's really a shame he's waiting for Katie because if she had her way, they'd be rolling around on the diner floor right now, getting it on, and hurries out before she can rip his shirt off.

James sighs once she's gone, drinking the rest of the milkshake and paying for his food. He stands up and goes into the men's restroom to relieve himself – because bathroom breaks are not something that vampires can get away from – before leaving the diner as well.

He drives around for awhile longer, turning over what Muffy said in his mind. He wants so desperately to believe that what she suggested is true, but he's just not sure if he's capable of it. He's so used to the idea of Katie disliking him that he just can't wrap his mind around the theory that maybe it's because she likes him that she's doing all this.

It kind of doesn't make any sense.

But he knows he needs to find out. And the only way how that's going to happen is if he actually sits down and talks to Katie. If Muffy's right, then he doesn't actually have a hell of a lot to lose. And if she's wrong...Well, then he's going to be hitting the roads again. He might even take Muffy up on her offer because it's no use waiting around for someone who's never going to return the feelings. And he doesn't want to spend eternity feeling depressed and lonely and horny. He just doesn't.

So he does a U-turn right in the middle of a wide country road and heads back the way he came.

He's returning to the Palmwoodsylvania to face Katie.

* * *

**Well, there's Part II. I'm hoping you guys enjoyed it :) Sorry for the lack of Jatie moments, but they'll be coming in Part III, so I hope you guys will stick around long enough for that. Please feel free to review and let me know what you think! It's always appreciated.**


	3. Part III Suck the Pain Right Out

**Disclaimer: I do not own Big Time Rush**

**Guest#1: Apparently in the BTR universe, they're pretty good ;P Life usually isn't, but sometimes stories go the cliched route. Yay, I'm glad you did :) And thank you for taking the time to read and review, I really appreciate it :)**

**Guest#2 (btrfanfiction1516): Isn't he? Thank you for reading and reviewing, I always appreciate it!**

**A/N: Can we just pretend that I'm not a day late for a Halloween story? Pleeeaaasse? I was going to post this last night, but then I kept getting distracted so...yeah, it didn't happen. I'm so sorry! Please forgive me? Like Part I and Part II, the title for Part III is taken from Halestorm's song "Love Bites". Also, this is the last part for this story, so things more or less gets tied up in this chapter.**

**Warnings: Slayers, vampires, mentions of violence, language, innuendos, zombie body parts, cliches, and bad humor.**

**Enjoy Part III :)**

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**Part III: Suck the Pain Right Out**

When James arrives at the Palmwoodsylvania, it's chaos. The first thing he notices is Lightning curled up on the floor in a corner, chewing on a stack of limbs.

Oh great. Apparently Logan insulted him again. He really needs to learn to quit doing that because James is getting tired of chasing down errant body parts. It's creepy, weird, and just plain gross.

James groans and approaches Lightning gingerly. He may not be able to die unless a stake and his heart are involved, but he's still not too keen on the idea of getting his limbs chewed off. Plus, he's not entirely sure that body parts can grow back for vampires and he doesn't really want to find out.

Lightning looks up at him, eyes hidden behind those oversized sunglasses he always wears. James has no idea why a dog would need sunglasses, but he doesn't question it. Some things are better off left a mystery.

"Hey, buddy..." he says, a little nervously. Lightning barks. "I was wondering...could I have Logan's body parts back?"

Lightning growls, shaking what looks like an arm and yeah, James knows he should be used to the sight by now, but he feels as if his stomach is about to reject his food. He really should stick strictly with blood.

"Are you sure...?"

Lightning bares his teeth and James takes it as a sign that maybe he should get the fuck out of there. For such a little dog, Lightning is extremely terrifying.

James holds up his hands in the surrender sign and backs away, hurrying towards the elevator. Hopefully Logan's head is safely in apartment 2J.

He takes the elevator up, on the lookout for Katie, but he doesn't see her. With any luck she's in the process of figuring out how to get Logan's body back in one place, in one piece. If she isn't, then he's going to have a long talk with her about her priorities as a slayer.

He reaches 2J and quickly figures out that absolutely nothing is being done about Logan and Logan's missing body parts. Logan's head is perched on the couch, watching a late night Halloween special, and Kendall and Franken-Carlos are sitting on either side of the body-less horseman, looking extremely bored.

James decides to be as diplomatic as he knows how.

"Why the fuck aren't you guys trying to get Logan's limbs back?!" he hollers loud enough to wake Phoenix. Diplomacy has never really been his thing.

Kendall and Franken-Carlos look at him. Franken-Carlos grunts a couple of times, shrugging his massive Frankenstein shoulders, while Kendall says, "We were going to, but Lightning's freaky. Katie said she'd take care of it."

At least one of them has their shit together. James nods before asking, "Where _is_ Katie?"

Kendall shrugs, looking around. "Around here somewhere. Did you check the lobby?"

"She wasn't there."

"Maybe in an elevator?"

"Or an air duct," Logan suggests. "You know how much she loves hanging out in them."

James nods and turns on his heel, sweeping out of Apartment 2J like the dangerously hot vampire that he is.

He walks down the hall, nodding at the late night partiers who are still loitering around. They grin at him but he doesn't stop to chat. Instead, he struts with purpose to the elevator and jabs the button for it. A moment later, the doors slide open and James almost jumps back in surprise.

Katie is standing there, stake poised in her hand. She doesn't look quite as smooth and sleek as she did earlier. Instead, she appears to have gotten into a couple of fights. Dirt smudges her cheeks and forehead, and her ponytail is coming loose, messy strands hanging down around her face. Somehow, she still manages to look as hot as fuck, and he can almost feel his heart picking up speed. Almost. It's better than nothing.

She wipes at a smudge on her forehead with the back of her hand as he steps into the elevator with her. "Where'd you run off to?" she asks.

He shrugs. "A diner. I ran into Muffy."

"Lovely. The other vampire slayer. Which floor do you want?"

"I'm coming with you. I'm helping get Logan's limbs back."

Katie shrugs. "Suit yourself. Seems like a hot vampire would have better things to do than chase down some errant limbs."

"Well, I don't," he retorts as she hits the button for the lobby. "What've you been up to? You look like you got in a fight with a couple of evil vampires."

She smiles a little, tightening her ponytail and self-consciously straightening out her clothes, before leaning against the wall. The elevator lurches into movement before she says, "I wasn't fighting anyone. I was looking for you and it was dirty work. I was crawling through air ducts and I even ventured into the Palmwoods attic – I thought you might've been hiding up there. It seemed like a good place for a bat."

James blinks at her. "Why were you looking for me? And I'm not a bat."

"Because you took off so suddenly; I was worried. And whatever."

"You were worried about me?"

"Yeah." The elevator reaches the lobby and the doors slide open with a small hiss. They step out together.

"Why?" he wants to know.

"Who else am I going to chase around on Halloween night?"

"But you're not chasing me around," he points out. "We're teamed up."

"The night isn't over yet, Jamie," she says sweetly, patting his arm before leading him in Lightning's direction.

No, it isn't. And he's determined to make the most of it.

They reach Lightning and he tilts his head at them in general acknowledgement as he gnaws on what looks like a hand. Unpleasant. And very unsanitary.

Katie puts her hands on her hips and spreads her legs apart a little, her best badass slayer stance. "Lightning, I'm only going to ask this once – please give me Logan's body parts."

Lightning barks and spins around, shifting his tail in what appears to be an obscene gesture. Well. That's just rude.

Katie's jaw drops. "He just flipped me off!"

"Dogs are getting smarter by the day," James comments. "Now they're learning how to say _fuck you_ to people."

Katie screams in frustration and stomps her foot. "Damn it, Lightning! Give me the fucking body parts!"

Lightning barks and takes off, Logan's hand still in his mouth.

James shoots Katie a sardonic look and the double thumbs up sign. "Nice going. Really diplomatic. Remind me to never volunteer you for the UN."

"Just shut up and grab Logan's limbs," she growls.

"Bossy, bossy."

She glowers furiously at him as he bends down to pick up what looks like Logan's left leg. The next thing he knows, there's a dull thud in his ass and he's crumbling to the floor with a hoarse grunt. If he could breathe, all the wind would be knocked out of him. In this case it's kind of lucky that his lungs don't work, because it gives him a few extra seconds to react.

He winds his legs around Katie's and yanks her down on top of him, rolling her under him – ignoring the fact that he might be crushing some of Logan's bones – and pinning her hands over her head. She squirms under him, eyes dark, cheeks flushed, and her hair falling out of its ponytail. He takes the opportunity to slip his knee between her legs, not actually touching anything that might be considered inappropriate but enough to keep the teasing going.

"This isn't – we shouldn't be – Kendall will kill you!" Katie manages to gasp out, visibly flustered as his knee creeps upwards slightly.

"I'm already dead," he points out. He grabs her hand and places it over his heart. "See? No beat. You've been reminding me of that for months."

Her fingers drift over his chest, nudging the open buttons of his shirt apart a little more. The warmth of her touch is a lightning shock against his frigid skin, a heater against ice, and he can't help but shudder just a little bit.

She snatches her hand back as if burned. "We really should get Logan's body parts up to him..."

"You're the one who literally put your boot in my ass."

"Which I don't regret. But we have work to do."

He groans and pushes himself up, helping her to her feet. "Fine. Logan better thank us for this."

They gather up Logan's body parts and head back up to 2J. He, Kendall, and Carlos are all waiting for them, and Franken-Carlos grunts out, "Corndogs" expectantly.

"No corndogs, buddy," James says to him apologetically. "We're going to put Logan back together."

"For the most part," Katie adds.

Logan's eyes immediately narrow. "Why _for the most part_?"

"Because Lighting stole your hand."

"Not Righty!"

"Yes Righty." Katie lets out a huffy breath. "So we're going to go after him. You two," she snaps her fingers at Kendall and Franken-Carlos. "Get Mr. Organ Donor put back together. James and I are going in."

James nods and, feeling as if he should smudge black ink under his eyes, he follows her out of the apartment. They walk down the hall, the same path he trodded just an hour ago, and they get into the elevator. The only difference is, this time they take it down to the basement.

The basement is, admittedly, a creepy place. It's all dark and dingy with spider webs and cobwebs and other kinds of webs that James doesn't even want to think about. Katie flips on the light and they look around, quickly locating Lightning in his favorite corner, still chewing on Logan's hand. James is amazed that Logan's hand is still alive, but it's wiggling and making it very clear that it does not appreciate the attention Lightning is lavishing on it.

James has to sympathize with Righty. If he was being licked and bitten, he probably wouldn't be too happy either. Well, maybe if it was Katie doing the licking and biting. But she's the only exception.

Before he can break out singing that Paramore song, Katie drags him over to Lightning.

"Okay," she says, voice full of authority. "Give it up, Lightning. You're under doggy arrest."

Lightning whines in protest, obviously not realizing that Katie isn't any form of authority outside of vampires and demons. She doesn't even have a fake badge. She doesn't even have a fake ID.

"Don't try to argue," Katie snaps, and James can't decide if he wants to laugh or quiver in fear. Maybe a little bit of both. She may be tiny, but she looks about ready to start throwing stakes. Hopefully she decides against throwing them at him. "We both know you're not allowed to steal Logan's limbs. Now. Drop. The. Hand."

Logan covers his eyes with his paws, whimpering pathetically, and if Logan's hand wasn't still dangling from his mouth James might actually feel sorry for him.

"You heard me. Drop the hand, Lightning. _Now_!"

Righty falls out of Lightning's mouth and James dashes forward with killer vampire reflexes, picking it up and grabbing Katie's hand, dragging her out of the basement before Lightning decides he wants to go all Cujo on them. They escape up to 2J and James drops Righty in Logan's lap.

"There. We got your hand. You're welcome."

Logan snaps his hand back on and James winces, thinking he would pay big money to remove that sight from his memory.

"Thanks!" Logan chimes cheerfully as he stands up. "Now, I'm going to go find Camille. Halloween isn't over yet." He runs out, and Franken-Carlos lets out a sad sigh.

"Why don't you go find Stephanie?" Katie suggests. "You can be in her new movie."

He immediately perks up, grunts a couple of times, and lumbers off. Kendall stands up with a languid stretch, a low growl emanating from his throat. "I'm heading off to play Frisbee with Jo," he announces. "Have fun, you two." He pauses on his way out the door and shoots them both warning glares. "But not too much fun. No killing, and no impregnating."

James and Katie both blush, and satisfied that his job as a big brother and best friend is finished for the night, he walks out, off to find Jo.

James and Katie turn to each other, and Katie raises her stake, a flirtatious smirk playing around her lips. "So," she says as she walks over to him, prodding the stake against his chest. "I think it's time I get you back for that little stunt you pulled in the lobby."

James shrugs. "I don't." And then he takes off.

She's hot on his heels but he doesn't care. He zooms in and out of doorways, down the stairwell, through the lobby, back up the staircase, into an empty hall. Katie immediately pounces, shoving him into the wall. He lets her wheel him around and she grins in satisfaction. "Wanna hear a vampire slayer joke? I know lots of them."

"I'm pretty sure the punch line for every one of them is _you should try the stake_," he replies, ducking out as she raises her stake again and instead slams her into the wall. "I'm cool with not being killed again, thank you very much."

"You hear the one where the slayer and the vampire walk into a bar?"

"I believe so." He finds himself up against the wall now, her body weight pressed against him to keep him in place. He can feel her heartbeat pounding rhythmically, hear her breath, slow and deep and steady. He can't remember ever wanting her this badly. Yeah, he's wanted her like hell for quite awhile, but this? This is just intense. It's deep. It's head spinning. It makes him want to sink his fangs into her neck and get lost in her blood. Rumor has it that nothing is sweeter than the blood of a vampire slayer. He wouldn't mind finding out.

"Bummer. That's my best one."

He spins them around so that she's the one backed into the wall now and she looks up at him through her lashes, lips parted ever so slightly.

James knows an opportunity when he sees one, and this one is screaming "take me, take me, take me!" Before he can think about it twice, he presses his lips to Katie's, forceful and intense, and she grips him, dragging him closer to her. He braces his hands against the wall, level with her head, as she winds her arms around his neck, deepening the kiss.

He drags his fangs against her bottom lip and she lets out a little whimper but doesn't try to pull back, so he repeats it experimentally. She tugs at the hair at the nape of his neck, pushing herself even closer, before forcing her tongue into his mouth. He takes it, letting her gain control long enough for her to push him into the wall. She raises a leg, wrapping it around his waist, and he takes the hint, picking her up.

She clings to him, deepening the kiss even more and he finds himself sinking into her like she's the Atlantic Ocean and he's the Titanic.

At last she breaks the kiss, inhaling a deep, sharp breath, and she looks up at him with big eyes, dark and hazy. "What the – what was that?"

"I – I kissed you."

"I – I got that," she says, her voice every bit as shaky as his.

"Was that – okay?"

Katie nods. "Better than okay. I've been wanting you to do that for awhile."

"You showed that really well with the _trying to kill me_ part."

She shrugs. "I had to do something to get your attention."

"By trying to kill me?"

"I didn't actually kill you, did I?"

"Thankfully, no."

"I wasn't going to kill you. I just wanted you to pay attention to me."

"Well, it worked."

"Good." She grins and pecks his lips before wiggling out of his grasp. "Come on, let's go back to the apartment. Halloween isn't over, and we have some celebrating to do."

He follows her back to 2J. "Hey, did you ever get it on with any of your professors or teachers or whatever the hell they were at that slayer camp?"

Katie gives him a long look. "Ew, no. They were all gross and old."

"Oh. Good."

"Relax." She smirks in amusement. "I'm still untouched. But hopefully not for long."

He actually gasps at the suggestion of her words, and she tosses a grin over her shoulder as she leads him into 2J and then into the bedroom.

Yeah, they've definitely got a lot of celebrating to do.

* * *

THE END

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**Yeah, I admit it. The ending was a cliche. I didn't even try for originality in this case, so sorry about that. And once again, I am so sorry this is being posted after Halloween! In any case, I'm hoping you guys still enjoyed it. Thank you for reading, and please review :)**


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